Aishwarya Rao


“Any good news?” enquired my sixty something neighbour aunty, as I stepped out of the taxi. This year, my summer holidays in India began on that note of interest. A deep interest displayed by a variety of people in our society – the neighbourhood shopkeeper, a friend’s would-be-mother-in-law, the Secretary of the ‘Colony Association’ as they bump into twenty something married girls they hardly know.
Earlier that day, I had invested about two hours of flight time mentally preparing clever remarks that I would come back with to tackle the profound curiosity of acquaintances and fifty something maamis, about the success stories of my sex life. Yet, as I stood in front of the familiar building in good old T.Nagar, no witty response came to my mind. Instead, I found myself mumbling something like “Not this time aunty” and hastily walking away, realizing that no amount of preparation can train you for the missile

Any good news?

The bad news is that it is launched infinite times, restrained and otherwise by a number of ‘relatives and friends’ and by the end of my holidays, I had heard it all - from the delicate
Are you and your husband happy?
the implied
Hasn't it been three years since your wedding?
the ingenious
Your classmate Lavanya has named her second daughter Diya
and the candid
When is your father going to have a grandchild to play with?

This time there was even an order

By this time next year you should be in the family way!
No kidding – by this time next year. Clearly adding a branch to the family tree is that straightforward.
Don’t misunderstand me. I am neither against the idea of breeding nor do the incessant and obnoxious family quizzes fluster me. I only find it tedious to explain my life’s plan to random folks I bump into. Every time a person so innocently picks my brain I find myself questioning their logic and motive – and in most cases I am unsuccessful in discovering a reasonable answer.
Since pretending not to have heard the question never works with maamis who are adamant to hear your story, I often try the “My husband and I are living together in the same city. Isnt that great news in itself maami?” Mostly it works. Other times I surrender and listen to the scientific explanations and strong recommendations of these self-made family counselors – “When I was twenty six, I had my fourth child” (Clearly your recreation options were rather limited!), silently counting my blessings. After all, the REAL good news is that these nosy neighbours are an exclusive summer holiday special.
As for my own parents and immediate family - they say,

Leave it to God. He will make it happen when the time is right

Easy. Isn't it?
Oh wait – Why is God a ‘He’? Well that calls for an entirely different post, doesn't it?
24 Responses
  1. Abhi Says:
    This comment has been removed by the author.

  2. Abhi Says:

    And there was abhishek.that also deserves an entirely different post,doesnt it?;)


  3. Lol. Indha maadhiri irrelevanta onnala mattum thaan comment adika mudiyum.


  4. I saw your post title on reader, then saw the pic and assumed what-it-is-you-know-I-would-assume. Thank God that I read through the post!!! :D :D

    But yeah, namba maamis ku aduthavaaloda procreation plans mele romba aaval. :P


  5. Preeti Says:

    Hilarious post di!


  6. Lol, im not surprised. Thanks for FB + Twitter. Our recreation options are not so bad indeed.


  7. Girish Says:

    Absolutely. Easy!


  8. SK Says:

    I can so relate! But of course they give up after a while.


  9. The Nomad Says:

    HMMM Know the feeling. If you do not have plans to do as they expect... trust me it will get worse... Discrete mentions of docs will also start happening :)

    OUr neighbourly mamai's cant accept the fact that there may be some people who love having fun and do not want kids of their own !


  10. LOL! i know exactly what u r talkin about! awesome post macha!


  11. Purvaja Says:

    Man!! I can relate to this sooo much although it has not been that long since we got married Rao. I guess the time factor dosent really make a difference to these maamis :)


  12. So Ash, any good news? ;)


  13. Hi Ash,

    I have been a long follower of your blogs, you might even recognise / remember my blog / my comments which I used to update in the Ice Age!

    I live in Sydney and work for a MC firm. Me and my wife are planning on a vacation to Tasmania and remembered your post on Tasmania sometime back. So thought if you could direct us to anything useful regarding - time to visit, places to see, etc.?

    I am reachable on sgbharathwaj@gmail.com if you don't mind being a Tour Guide and show us the way! :)

    Really appreciate your help,

    Cheers,
    Bharath S.


  14. Lalitha Says:

    Well written.. Animated! Funny!! Interesting!! :)The cartoon is good as well...


  15. Parikk Says:

    Awesome post, Hillarious !!!


  16. vaiju Says:

    i loved reading it :)


  17. george Says:

    This was a really funny post and a great depiction of traditional Indian culture and societal norms. I would be very interested in having you on as a guest blogger for CheapOair. Let me know if your interested: gchristodoulou (a.t) CheapOair.com


  18. Manasa Says:

    You tell them next time that you've great news, that is: "ooh maami, you know your hubby dear has an affair ;)Isn't that a great news :P You never knew this since you were always interested in others news."

    She will never bother others again. :)


  19. Karuna Says:

    I can so relate to this!


  20. This comment has been removed by the author.

  21. archer_sr Says:

    I hit upon your blog from your twitter account, and man this article is hilarious! I have ued the reply "have ur own kids if u want them so much" and that conversation did not end well :)

    - Sowmya


  22. sivya Says:

    WIN :) and Subscribed :).
    I have been in a similar situation for the last three years, every time MIL asks me, i quickly change the topic or hand over the phone to the mister.... Consulting a fertility specialist was the most candid/invasive comment we have had to tolerate as a couple.


  23. Aparna Says:

    I have no idea why my last post said Sivya....


  24. This is the story of my life :D :D

    Loved your writing style!